When Rachel rambles

Enough with summer adventures posts, time to get to the serious matters. Yep, I do get serious when needed. Especially now that I have to keep my life on track, the adult way. I'm only 19 so it kind of makes it hard to make myself believe that I have to act like an adult already. This is all happening way too fast and I'm still so young. I still want to do the teenage stuff 'coz hey, I'm still a teenage girl! Wait, where do you think I'm going with this? Nooo, I'm not getting married or moving out of my parents' house. 

NOOOO, not yet at least. I'm just overwhelmed with the fact that I'm now obliged to be have a job, earn for myself, stand on my own and just be an adult in general. Just the thought of it scares me. That's why I'm not that aligaga to look for a job because I'm scared with what's out there! What if I couldn't handle the stress? What if my colleagues won't like me? What if my boss is the son of Doofenshmirtz? Oh my.. see? I was thinking of an evil counterpart of my future boss and I thought of Heinz Doofenshmirtz from Phineas and Ferb! I hate how my mind functions in a very Disney-like childish way. 

I got interviewed already in several PR and publishing companies around Metro Manila and I'm just waiting for their call for my final interview or whether I'm in for the job na. But I've been waiting for two weeks already, and I can't help but wonder if I didn't sell myself well enough during my interviews or whaaat! Two weeks feels literally like forever. Some of my friends already have jobs and whenever we get together, they would rant about how stressful their job is. And there I am, nodding and making the face "Tell me more!" I'm really happy for them, but when you're in my case.. it kinda sucks to be just the one who listens. 

But when I sometimes imagine myself having a job and dealing with the "real world" stress, I get nervous. It's nothing like what I hoped for my first day in college, to be friends with people who wouldn't bring out the worst in me, because this time, I'm on my own. It's within my own discretion. 

Yikes.